The Day I Quit

After several years of working for Starbucks I decided to find another job. It took a few months of hard work but I found a sales job that looked very promising. I had gone through the process of leaving Starbucks. Over the course of being with the company for seven years I had made a lot friends with fellow coworkers and customers alike. Some good byes were heartbreaking. I had a lot of history in this place. But I felt the desire to change pulling me in a different direction. I wanted to do something completely different. 

The sales job was a very welcome change of pace. I relished the opportunity to learn new skills and make more money. I was meeting new people and I felt like I was stretching my wings and taking risks is ways I hadn't been in years. 

I struggled a little with learning this new job. Some things felt awkward but I would calm my nerves by reminding myself that I was comfortable at Starbucks and I needed to patient with myself as I harnessed new abilities. 

One my second day of training I was paired with a man a few years younger than myself. His sales territory was in New Smyrna Beach, the farthest from the main office. We began visiting the local businesses while he lead with his sales pitch. We visited business after business and he became increasingly rude with the people he was trying to sell to. In a few short hours I began to question his behavior. He made some off-the-cuff remark about how "that was how the business worked". It was the coldness of his tone when he said it that shocked me the most. I endured his lack of empathy has he became openly racist with one woman and almost got us kicked out of another business. I remember walking side by side with him to the next business; my hands were shaking as I stared at the ground. He was never rude to me but his remorseless lack of ethics made him uncomfortable to be around. He told me that he wanted me to make the sales pitch at the next office we were about to visit. 

There was a brief pause before I answered him. 

"To be perfectly honest I don't want to do the next one. This isn't the job that I thought is was and it is not the job for me. We can finish up the rest of the day here but when we get back to the office I'm going to quit." 

He was a definitely surprised by my decisive candor but the only response he had was a dry "Yeah, it's not for everyone." 

He made one more pitch before abruptly deciding to take me back to the office about three hours early. The drive was long and silent. His fancy car was reminder of all the money that the employees of that company typically make. After my bold declaration it was clear that I would not come close to making that kind of pay. It didn't matter. I was relieved. I just stared out the car window at the beautiful formations of the clouds. I was free. 

We got back to the office and I unceremoniously signed the paperwork. It was only my second day on the job. I rode the elevator alone and walked down the main hallway to get to my car. I thought about the money that I could have made, I thought about how my friends and family would react to my quitting a job I had just gotten. I thought about how it had taken me months to find this job and how I would have to start all over again - this time without the security of having a job at Starbucks. I was completely unemployed and that just begun to sink in. 

I got to my car and called my boyfriend. All I could say was that "I quit". He got off work early and we met at a restaurant in Winter Park. I told him what happened and I said that I firmly believed I had done the right thing by leaving that company. He agreed and supported my decision. Then we began to cheer up and laugh. Our waiter came to the table and asked us what we were celebrating. "I just quit my job" I cheerfully explained. 

It was scary trying to find a new job and then suddenly leave after getting what looked like a great opportunity. The truth was that it didn't feel right and I knew I could find a better job. I knew it would have been a waste of time to try and make it work. I have better things ahead. 

Little Snail

After a nice long rain I decided to go check my mailbox. As I turned the corner of my building I happened to glance at my window sill and see this adorable little snail.

Lovely Dining With You

Early in 2014 my friend Matt decided to move to Tampa. In the months that followed we would make plans to meet. We would normally catch up over lunch and I always took photos. 

Thrilled at Einstein Bagels.

Trying to find peace at Bikkuri Sushi.

Avoiding the paparazzi at Tijuana Flats.

Trapped in my apartment.

Trying to enjoy a hamburger at Checkers somewhere in Seffner after coming to rescue me from the highway after one of my tires exploded. 

Remarkably, after all this, he still agrees to meet up with me.

The Bet

Back in high school I took an art class with a friend who was a very devoted fan of anime. I love the human form. I was always interested in people and how to capture everything from their powerful movements to subtle gestures. I would argue with my friend that although most anime was very detailed it often lacked the intricacies of anatomy. 

My friend was offended at my statement. "Yeah, well I bet you couldn't even draw anime" 

"Are you serious?" I boasted "Of course I can!" 

I borrowed one of his manga comic books called Oh My Goddess! and set to work. 

Within a few days I produced this illustration featuring five of the main characters from the story. Two of the characters feet remain unfinished to this day. However, when I showed the drawing to my friend his jaw hit the floor.

"You're right" he conceded "You can draw it extremely well."

So far this remains my one and only attempt at drawing anime.

This self-induced project born out of a bet helped me realized that I could create anything with pencil and paper.

Skull Study

Recently I had gone through some of my old drawings and I found this: 

A study of a skull that I had done in college. It reminded me of how much I loved my drawing classes. The funny thing is that I have drawn that skeleton so many times I was sure I would be sick of it. But the truth is that I can only see it as a thing of beauty. The roundness of the cranium, the angles of the jaw, the way the cheek bone sticks out to define the face - it is structure and definition at its finest. 

Cloudy

"What a lovely day; there isn't even a cloud in the sky". 

What makes a cloudless day so perfect? 

That pleasant blue hue that hangs over us every day is a back drop for those ever changing clouds. 

The atmosphere is huge but the clouds are what gives it dimension. We would lose our grasp of how expansive our sky truly is without clouds. When you look at those gorgeous cumulonimbus clouds that look like giant piles of fluffy mashed potatoes you can see the way the sunlight and shadows gives it  such depth and texture. Like if you could somehow get close enough to touch it would be the most luxurious thing to grace your fingertips. Or the cirrus clouds at the very edges of the atmosphere. So far away and so delicate it is almost a wonder that they hold any shape at all. 

And then you have my favorite type of sky: a mixture of many forms. enormous fluffy clouds layered in front of swirling levels of altocumulus and cirrostratus. Then, looming off to the side is dark, all consuming rain cloud unleashing all of its water over some distant patch of land. All are moving at different rates depending on the wind and what place in the sky they hold. Some existing peacefully, others about to collide. From one perspective the clouds could look like an inviting day-dream; a weightless playground. Then you could turn your gaze upon a cloud that feels like the devil himself could be just on the other side and he is about to bring hell with him. 

The most beautiful days can be cloudy. You can be standing in one spot and see everything the weather has to offer. You can be grounded to this earth while a sky filled with clouds dances for you. 

Grounded: The Art of Looking Down (Part 8)

I was waiting to meet my friend Meghan outside of a Tijuana Flats for Taco Tuesday. I liked the way the rapidly diminishing sunlight was grazing the hoods of the park cars and bouncing off the gravel in the parking lot.

My bright pink sandals against the Tetris styled Publix bathroom tile floor. 

Standing in a park pavilion in downtown St.Petersburg. Those beautiful magenta petals had recently fallen off of the trees that surrounded the park. 

I was on my way to DRIP when I got caught in the rain. I took shelter at a nearby Bahama Breeze restaurant and enjoyed what little cover their awning provided.